Thursday, May 31, 2012

Dreams and Waking


A year and a half ago, when I was working in the Edinborough Corporate Center in Edina, I was taking my lunch break in Edinborough Park. It had been a strange day, and I was allowing myself to use my lunch break, to, well, totally space out. And when I space out, I really space out. I find myself naturally slipping out of my body into other places and perspectives, sometimes even when I'm not meaning to. (I suppose this is one of the skills I picked up from experiencing abuse - many abuse survivors learn how to dissociate and separate from their bodies in times of trauma. I have transformed this into a skill to use in meditation and lightwork.) I suddenly found that Edinborough Park had changed; the world was slanted, as if I was on a staircase, residing in the slant between two floors. I was between two worlds, two realities, two planes. I saw the park, but I saw the layers of energy used to create the illusion of the park. Everything was alive, and the energy was so dense I felt powerful enough to create anything I chose. I saw that everything had its own energy signature. And then, I felt an energy signature that was familiar to me. It was the signature of a dream I had had. I found myself IN the dream again, energetically. From there, I discovered I could navigate into other dreams as well, simply by seeking the energy signature. It was that day that I truly realized that our dreamworld and our waking world touch eachother, and that I could walk between them.

From that point, the two worlds became closer and closer. Dreams led to waking events, waking events led to dreams. There are many cases where I will dream something of someone and then tell that person about it upon waking. Many times, the dream will be accurate to the subject's past experiences. Other times, the dream resonates with them, and then they go on to fulfill the exact thing I dreamt. That makes me wonder a few things. 1. Did I dream a future that would have existed whether I had told the person or not? 2. Did I create the future I dreamt by telling them? And 3. Does it even really matter which is which? I have experienced psychic impressions with perfect strangers, going both ways, and I have learned deep intimate secrets from those I care about, as well as about myself. With these occurrences, I have discovered with even more conviction that the waking world and the dreamworld are connected, and what's even more important, WE ARE ALL CONNECTED THROUGH THEM!

When I began doing healings on clients, I went deeper down this rabbit hole. During the healings, I found myself emptying, transcending, going to other places and planes and seeing many things. I was quite surprised to find that while traversing these other places on behalf of my clients, I wandered through many energetic signatures from past dreams! Here, in this transcendent place of healing, is access to all the dreams I've ever had, as real as when I first dreamt them. It was in this moment that I truly realized that the dreamworld and the otherworld (the place beyond this place, the "other side") are the same place.

I often have dream familiars visit me-- teachers and guides and healers. When something is wrong, I am given strange medicines of moonstone capsules and magical fingernails. When I am in need of comforting, I dream of beluga whales and otters playing with me in big pools where I can easily breathe underwater. When I am feeling weak, Merlin visits me with oatmeal to give my heart strength. All of my prayers are being answered and all of my needs are being met in the otherworld if only I have the imagination to see it. And once I see it, it spills over into the waking world as well, where I can use synchronicity as my compass. Anything we need, we can discover in the dreamworld if only we have the eyes to see.

Let's recap:
-The dreamworld and the otherworld are the same place.
- In this place we have access to the past, present and future of ourselves and everyone we can imagine.
-We can access this place anytime we desire, for anything we could ever possibly need. 

So what are you dreaming about?
:)

Sunday, May 20, 2012

Why not?


Change is most often the hardest because we've developed the tendency to make assumptions about happiness. This kind of life = this kind of structure. These kinds of decisions = eventual happiness vs. these kinds of decisions = unhappiness. If you have this = you cannot have that.

Even when we work to not do this, we still do it. I had the biggest example of this smack me in the face and blow my mind this past week:

A little over a year ago, I had this big magical dream for my life. I was going to be a shaman, traveling the world, helping to heal, living on top of a mountain, single and fabulous forever. And then! I fell in love, got engaged, and am getting married in October of this year. And when I saw myself developing this new life with this man with our new rituals and habits and lifestyles, somewhere in my consciousness I was under the impression that I was giving up my old dream for this one. I knew I couldn't be this powerful shaman and be someone's devoted wife at the same time. It just didn't work that way.

When the wedding planning started getting intense, I found myself getting lost in it all. People telling me what traditions I was to uphold, what items I was to register for, what kind of wedding I would have. I've heard a lot about what I'm "supposed" to be. So I freaked out, of course! I don't want to be this, this is not me! I don't think I want this, this is not my dream! Ugh I don't think I can do this! I wanted to be a shaman and now I can't!


And then I realized... WHY NOT?

Who said I can't have both?  I choose the life I want, and I can choose to embrace and embody both aspects which seemed so conflicting to me. Happiness to me is a fulfilled spiritual existence where I can grow and lead. Happiness to me is also being with an unconditional lover for a lifetime. Happiness = happiness. Why do we need to complicate it and limit ourselves by what we think is the way things work?

It was such a simple realization. But so rarely do we truly feel like we can accomplish all of our dreams. By allowing myself to express my limitations (via freaking out), they came to the surface to be re-evaluated. It forced me to ask myself the question Why not?

So this a simple reminder. A reminder for you to speak the limitations you're placing on yourself and ask yourself a question. Nothing poetic, nothing profound, just a simple question.

WHY NOT?